Nicholas Rush (
lottawork) wrote in
bigapplesauce2015-08-28 07:16 pm
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things have gotten closer to the sun [closed]
He has it.
It had come together unprompted, without the click and slide of a solution slotting easily into place. There is never a click, a common misconception even in the highest echelons of academia - there is never a well-timed stroke of brilliance turned over by some new fragment of insight, simply the give of a problem folding beneath the fierce, continuous, brute force pressure of the uncontained mind. For weeks he has considered it, has become an expert in fields utterly beyond the scope of his specialties or his prolonged interest, and even with the minor distraction of Jackson's spontaneous return to the flesh, he has done little else but attack the set of circumstances without compromise.
The dog is asleep when he exits the building, and he locks his door upon departure, his movements streamlined by the fervent intent of intellectual energy, the strap of his bag taut over his chest as he commits himself to the grueling inadequacies of public transportation.
He knocks immediately upon building entry. He expects Asadi will be waiting for him.
It had come together unprompted, without the click and slide of a solution slotting easily into place. There is never a click, a common misconception even in the highest echelons of academia - there is never a well-timed stroke of brilliance turned over by some new fragment of insight, simply the give of a problem folding beneath the fierce, continuous, brute force pressure of the uncontained mind. For weeks he has considered it, has become an expert in fields utterly beyond the scope of his specialties or his prolonged interest, and even with the minor distraction of Jackson's spontaneous return to the flesh, he has done little else but attack the set of circumstances without compromise.
The dog is asleep when he exits the building, and he locks his door upon departure, his movements streamlined by the fervent intent of intellectual energy, the strap of his bag taut over his chest as he commits himself to the grueling inadequacies of public transportation.
He knocks immediately upon building entry. He expects Asadi will be waiting for him.
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Rush sighs with both hands braced against either side of the sink, and breathes.
He dashes the back of a wrist over his face, swiping away the sleep sticking to his eyelids, and exits.
"Of course," he says dryly. "I should have assumed. Planning on telling her anytime soon?" He delivers the question smoothly, seamlessly injecting it into the conversation with a vagueness he's certain she'll find less than amusing.
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Oh wait. She lifts her head, rolling her shoulders back slightly as his intended meaning reaches her.
"...Right," she says. "I don't see why it matters so much to you."
She pours the coffee into the thermos and shuts it tightly.
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He retrieves his bag with the fluid catch and pull of a hand, its load considerably lighter than it was the night prior.
"My advice?" Rush looks at her coolly. "Don't prolong it. That benefits none of the parties involved."
apparently it was time for heavy introspection, do u regret asking yet rush
"Thank you," she says, managing to sound only a little droll. "I'm sure it will be handled when the time is right."
She picks up her wallet, keys, and phone, adjusts her hijab a bit, and heads out with him.
On their way to the subway station she eventually resumes the conversation, speaking slow and thoughtfully: "No one is strictly benefiting from this, no. But you have to consider what this would mean to Greta. She wants to go home, and we've promised to find a way. She has a husband there, a son. She doesn't expect them to wait for her long - life expectancy in that world isn't what it is to us. I don't want to make myself an obstacle. I don't want to confuse her. If she became involved with anyone here, it would be - a distraction. Temporary at best. An unwanted intrusion at worst."
She sighs heavily. It's hard to think along these lines, but it's important, too, to say it out loud. Reinforce it for herself. As close as she's come recently to spilling this truth, it merits revisiting.
"That's not even getting into the other thing," she says. She waits to continue until they've navigated the morning commuters, have slid through the turnstiles, and are waiting on the platform. "She didn't know people like us existed until she got here. Sexual and gender fluidity, that's - there's so much that's all foreign to her. She's adapting, of course, but it's one thing to know it exists and another to confront it in yourself, after a lifetime of knowing and living a solitary option." She shakes her head, pulling her arms around herself - enjoying the fact that she can. "There's no way I can think for me to tell her how I feel without it being a predominantly selfish act."
The train arrives, loud and grating, and she steps on. A woman moves conspicuously to avoid standing near her; a man gives her a lingering dirty look. She ignores them. This is easy. They do not matter.
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The subject is not one he is eager to debate at any length - he simply finds it incredibly fucking grating that both women seem, apparently, reluctant to define their relationship. Seeming lack of social understanding demonstrates an absence of interest, not necessarily the absence of any particular skill. He -
He does not want to think of her, and even less does he want to think of Mandy.
He torques his mind from the subject mercilessly.
"Talk to her about it," he says, managing to sound exasperated rather than anyone intent on distributing romantic advice in good faith. "Regardless of outcome, the both of you can only benefit from that option."
The train hisses to a stop with the straining screech of steel on steel and he boards, studiously avoiding eye contact with the faceless, nameless, innocuous flood of pedestrians as they pass from arrival to destination in a featureless, streamlined spill.
The heavy mechanical sound of the train pulling out heralds the powerful jolt that nearly upsets his center of gravity. He scowls.
public harassment and racism, bc apparently this thread was too delightful
Maybe he'll accept that.
She keeps silent for the ride, steadfastly staring ahead to avoid the glances of strangers who have, apparently, never seen a hijabi before.
There is one man, however, who becomes increasingly difficult to ignore, his stare is so brazenly unbroken. After several stops and no departure on his part, she sighs and looks back at him, meeting his eyes calmly.
"Have you been helped, sweetie?" she says with a smile that doesn't reach her eyes.
Her open condescension does the trick. The man straightens up in unconcerned offense, his stare now less accusing and more disgusted.
He answers her in a low grunt, only partially audible under the metallic shriek of the train; she rolls her eyes before he's even done, it's just the usual shit, terrorists and murderers, yes, yes. Oh, nice, a slur, how original. She laughs derisively and shakes her head. Joke's on you, buddy, no one's killing her good mood. Not today.
Her lack of reaction, as it often does, only garners more scorn; the man snaps, "Take that thing off in here. This is America."
She looks, this time, at Rush, who she'd previosuly been avoiding; the only thing worse than being spoken to like this is having it done in front of friends. But that opening was too good.
"Oh my god," she says, giving him a theatrically accusing stare. "We're in AMERICA? How drunk did we GET last night?"
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Rush arches a brow with an atypical theatrical flare, unimpressed.
He looks at the man in question with as much scathing self-possession as he can bring to bear, the full, intolerable force of his unmitigated scorn from which the offender cannot help but look away.
"Unfortunately, I don't believe a response monosyllabic enough exists in his case." He smiles, icy and flinted. "He needn't have acquainted himself with an entire new vocabulary on our account."
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They exit the train finally, allowing her to breathe a little easier, easier still as they return above ground and approach Rush and Greta's building.
"You wanna drop in and say hi?" she asks nonchalantly as he opens the front door.
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The implication that he would in any capacity prefer the option of being able to 'say hi' is absurd, and Rush snorts. "And do what, exactly."
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That isn't an immediately useful thought. He dismisses it.
He looks at the ceiling in quiet vexation and says nothing, even as the doors slide noiselessly open and they enter the hall.
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She lets her left arm hang limply at her side, the weight of it unbearable even after so little a reprieve, but it's worth it for a little good-natured theatrics. She gives him a meaningful look and then lifts her hand to rap lightly on the door. "Special delivery," she announces.
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A quick peek out the peephole reveals that yes, it was - and that Rush is here, too. It's not like Iman to show up unannounced. It's not like Rush to show up at all. Greta opens her mouth, shuts it, and then opens the door instead.
"... Hello," she says, looking between them with a faint, bewildered smile. "Is everything all right?"
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She feels like a little kid, playing tricks like this, grinning so broadly her cheeks hurt; without waiting for a go-ahead she steps forward and wraps her right arm around Greta, pulling her into a warm embrace. After just a moment she lifts her other arm, wrapping that around her as well. "That's better," she says gleefully.
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"Are you quite done?" he says airily, doing a fucking excellent job at masking his relief in having been stranded in the hallway and not having been inducted into their affectionate conglomerate.
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Then Iman wraps her other arm around her.
For a beat, all she registers is that the hug just got nicer. Then it hits her, and she lets out an entirely undignified squawk of delight. "Your arm!" It's warm, and it's working, and Greta tightens her hold for a few moments before taking Iman by the shoulders so she can pull back and look at the prosthetic. "It's all fixed?" Without bothering to worry about propriety, she takes Iman's left arm in her hands. It feels alive again, and she runs her palms down Iman's forearm to her hand, pressing it gently between her own. "You can feel with it and everything?"
Rush's droll aside earns him a look that is far too pleased to reach exasperation. "What are you still doing out there?" He helped; surely he ought to be part of the impromptu celebration.
And speaking of. Greta grins back down at Iman, feeling so happy she could burst, and pulls her into another hug. It's not even about what this might mean for her; she knows how much this means to Iman. She hasn't really been herself since she lost the arm; now that it's back, everything will be better.
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She peeks over at Rush and grins at him. See? This was worth the little visit, right?
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"There's still progress to be made," he says as he sets the thermos down on the table with a soft click. "But we've managed to isolate and complete the primary objective."
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"What do you still have to do?" The question's barely out before she realizes what a terrible host she's being, and she gives her head a little shake. "I'm sorry--are you hungry? Can I get you anything?" She glances between the two of them inquiringly.
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He makes it as far as the corner of the table before it occurs to him to question what the fuck he is doing here. He turns and learns that in Greta's definition of a hug, there is, apparently, kissing involved.
"Much work to be done." He fixes Asadi with an even look. "Do enjoy each other's company."
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Iman responds to him with a snort and a dismissive wave, eager to devote her full attention to Greta without him standing there judging her. He needs the break anyway. He's put up with a lot.
Once he's gone she looks up at Greta, keeping a hand on her waist, because, just because.
"I would love some breakfast if it's not too much trouble," she says sheepishly. "I can help!" She lifts her left hand and waves it to demonstrate, still beaming like a kid showing off a good grade or something.
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Iman's arm might not be entirely restored, then, but this is still an enormous accomplishment, and a far sight better than just having an inert limb hanging at her side. Greta catches Iman's hand when she waves it in front of her, suddenly struck with the impulse to do something more - something absurd, like press a kiss to her palm. The thought makes her cheeks prickle with embarrassment, and she settles for giving Iman's hand a gentle squeeze.
"Come on, then," she says, pulling her into the kitchen. "I'm teaching you how to make muffins."