bigapplesauce | Bewere

Current Music: January 27, 2013 (backdated)

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Bewere

Yuri sighs as he trudges down the corridor. He's been feeling grouchy the last few days, his temper shortening and his hunger growing. In other words, he feels just like he does every month. Even though he's just had dinner, he finds himself thinking longingly of breakfast.

He also finds himself thinking of Daine as he checks each of the doors he passes, making sure for the fourth or fifth time that they've been put back together right. He made her promise not to come visit him -- or at least, he told her she had as good as promised and that he'd hold her to it, even if she said no such thing herself. She should never have come to see him the first time, and he won't have her on his conscience because she came again and got hurt or turned. Caught up in his thoughts, he isn't careful enough with the second door, and burns himself on a spoon. Without making a conscious decision to do it, he lashes out, hitting the door so it swings and rebounds off the wall, rattling the silverware. Sheepishly, he sticks his fingertip in his mouth and hurries on -- he has time yet before the transformation, but it's getting harder to keep his head.

He's several steps into the room with the cage before it registers that he's not alone. Freezing in the middle of the room, he lets out a huff that's halfway between annoyance and despair.

"Get out."

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"I'm not a regular bear," argues Yuri right back. "Regular bears just -- I dunno, do bear stuff. They don't hurt people just to hurt them. I told you last time I'd kill you if I could get at you. I'm not going to be able to help it, and I don't want to sit here all night thinking about how much I want to tear you to pieces."

He lets out a sigh of his own. "Kinda late for you to leave, anyway," he points out.

"Is that what you did last time?" Daine asks, eyebrows raised. "Just sat there and thought about eating me the whole night? If so, you hid it well." And bear-Yuri hadn't been particularly adept at hiding his state of mind. "You might not be a normal bear, but that doesn't make you a lost cause."

She nibbles at her thumbnail, wondering if she should risk mentioning what had happened to her, before Numair put a wall in her mind, and decides she has to. Otherwise, he might never take her seriously.

"I used to forget who I was, before," she admits quietly, twisting her hands together in her lap and staring at the floor so she doesn't have to see his expression. "When I was first learning to use my magic, if I listened too closely to other animals, I'd start to think I was one of them. I'd forget I was human. I - I even ran wild, once." She takes a steadying breath and makes herself look up at him. "That doesn't happen anymore, because I let someone help me. If I can help you, I have to try."

"Yeah, I did," replies Yuri stubbornly. So maybe he didn't think about that all night, but even thinking about it for a little while is too much. He wonders sometimes if Natalie felt that way every time he visited her, and if biting him was just giving in to what the bear in her had always wanted to do.

He's determined not to listen to her -- nothing she can say can make this enough unlike what happened between him and Natalie for it to be okay. By the time she finishes speaking and looks up at him, though, he's looking directly at her, brow furrowed in a mixture of concern and regret. He frowns, not wanting to give in on this, but he can't help but ask, "...How'd they help you?"

"I've got a wall in my mind," Daine replies. "It keeps my wild magic from getting tangled up with who I am, like it used to be." She's not sure if the same thing would work for Yuri, and without Numair here, it might be a moot point, anyway. Then she remembers that there are other folk here who can poke around minds without much trouble. "Maybe the Doctor or the TARDIS could do something like that for you. What you have is sort of like wild magic, so it might behave the same way if we tried to block part of your mind off from it. You'd still turn into a bear, but it might be easier to remember who you really are." She shrugs, not wanting to get his hopes too high despite her own cautious enthusiasm for the idea. "Meditation helps, too. I could teach you."

"Who're they?" asks Yuri, wrapping the blanket more tightly around him. On second thought, he says, "I dunno if I want anyone poking around in my head -- even if it'd...if it'd help."

There it is -- the first pang. He winces and rests his head against the wall, squeezing his eyes tight shut and trying to focus on staying calm. "I've known people who -- who could," he says through gritted teeth, not thinking clearly enough to notice that he's sort of flip-flopping, insofar as he's even coherent. "Remember."

Daine can hardly blame him for that - she hadn't been keen on them poking through her head, either. She'd trusted Numair, though, and if it could help... maybe she could talk him into meeting them, at least.

Oh, dear. She sits up a bit straighter, already wincing in sympathy. There's nothing she can do for him until he's bear enough for her magic to work. "Then you could, too," she says, trying to sound encouraging even though her voice isn't very steady. "I'm sure you could."

"It's different," he says, pulling too hard on the blanket and making one of the holes in it bigger. "They were younger -- when --"

He cuts off, unable to say more. He breaths hard through gritted teeth, pushing his head against the wall. He should have told Daine not to watch; now he's too caught up in the pain to worry about it, but later he'll be bothered by her having seen. He tries to hold it in and not scream in front of her, but as his body bulks up and his skeleton rearranges itself, he can't stay quiet. Fur erupts over his entire body, and he practically shreds the blanket when his claws come in. Soon, it's the sounds of a bear in pain that fill the room, not the sounds of a man.

She hadn't meant to watch, but she can't seem to help herself. Is this what it looks like to other folk when she shifts? It's not painful for her, though, and she bites her lip, bracing herself, as he becomes more bear and less human. Once he shows up in her head, she should be able to...

There! Off-color copper flares in her mind, and she gathers up a strand of her magic. Easy, she soothes, sending a wave of calm reassurance into the cage. It's all right. You're all right, Yuri.

Yuri pins back his ears and gives her a wild-eyed look from where he's still laying on the floor, claws scraping on the hard surface. Baring his still-changing teeth, he snarls to cover his confusion at the inrush of new scents and sounds and -- and the feeling that everything's alright? As the change finishes, he stumbles to his feet and lets out a bellow of general complaint. Considering he's normally roaring and charging the bars at this point, he's really doing quite well.

"I know," Daine says sympathetically once he's quieted down a bit. "It hurt. But it's over, now." She watches him with wary concern, wondering if he'll remember that he can talk to her without her prompting him. At least he's not battering himself against the bars like he was last month. If she can get him through the evening without him hurting himself, that would be something.

With a huff, Yuri lumbers over closer to the bars, eying her distrustfully. She was here when -- no. No, the pain didn't come from her. He thinks. He remembers he's annoyed with her, though it takes him a moment to place why that would be.

I told you to leave, he says after a bit of deliberation. Turning on his heel, he stalks along the bars, bumping them with his shoulder at each pace to test their solidity.

Even though he's gone right back to scolding her for being there, she lets out a relieved huff. "You remember," she replies approvingly.

She's less thrilled by his testing the bars, though she doesn't think he's bumping them hard enough to hurt himself. "I can't leave," she reminds him, "but it's okay. I'll stay right here, and we'll both be fine." She considers sending more magic into the cage, but holds off for the moment. It'd be better if he could stay calm without it, and he's doing rather well so far.

Nothing budges, of course. He's sort of relieved by that, and sort of irritated. With a glance and a growl at the silver-covered door, he turns and comes back the other way, testing the bars again for good measure. I hate this place, he informs her.

She can't blame him for that, either. She'd thought it was a terrible place to keep a bear when she'd first set eyes on it, and time hasn't changed her opinion. Yuri's complaint is a little surprising, though, given how insistent he was that the cage got the job done, as if that was all that mattered. Part of her is pleased that he's coming 'round to her way of thinking, but discussing the unpleasantness of the surroundings should probably wait until he's human again and less likely to take out his frustration on himself.

"Maybe we can make it better," Daine says. There might not be anything they can do about the size of the place, but there are other ways to make it all less dismal. "You have water, now," she adds. "That's good." Maybe pointing it out will only result in him swatting the bowl around, but better that than testing the bars.

He would argue, of course, that it doesn't matter how much he hates it. He'd hate it no matter what it was; all he wants is to run free, and the bars are stopping him. I hate water, he quips back, not realizing how ridiculous the statement is. He just hates everything right now, really. He comes to the water dish, gives it a sniff, and swings a paw at it. He doesn't hit it hard enough to knock it over or send it flying, but water sloshes out of it and across the floor.

The silliness of that statement isn't lost on Daine, and she has to bite her lip to keep from grinning. He sounds like Alanna's Thom having a sulk. Once she's sure she can speak without giggling, she says, "Try not to spill it all. I won't be able to refill it if you decide you want some later."

She can see that he's still grumpy, so she ventures, "At least you're not alone." That has to be a good thing, right?

With a derisive snort, he turns again to pace his way back to the other end. I wanted to be alone, he lies. At least he has the presence of mind not to throw the water dish when he comes back to it on the next trip around the cage -- but he needs to break something, so he goes after the blanket instead, gripping one end between his teeth and clawing at it to tear new holes in the fabric.

"Doesn't mean you ought to be alone," she replies mildly, watching him shred the blanket. Next month, she'll have to add a few sturdy toys, or something else that he can swat around.

Her stomach twists when she realizes that she's already thinking about next month, as if it's a given that she'll still be here. It's not as if she's given up hope of her friends finding her... but she's beginning to wonder if it might be better to assume it will take them a good while longer and only risk being pleasantly surprised if they show up sooner, instead of feeling let down every day when they fail to appear.

And then there's the matter of the friends she's made here. Even if she could go home tomorrow, she wouldn't like leaving Edgar or Luke behind. And the thought of leaving Yuri to spend every full moon alone in this dismal little room is almost physically painful. Daine rests her chin on her knees, too absorbed in her own thoughts to try and talk Yuri into at least leaving enough blanket intact to rewrap himself after moonset.

Edited 2013-04-10 01:39 (UTC)

Edgar frowns at Kuiv's retreating back from the room where he and Almondine are hiding.

He's never met Kuiv before, though Daine pointed her out to him once, but if she's involved he's even more concerned about what Daine is up to. She's been avoiding him, acting cagy, going to bed late and sleeping in the next day. And now she's in some part of the base he's never been to before, a part he didn't even know existed, doing something that involves a visit from someone to high up the chain for Edgar to know.

Checking to make sure Kuiv is out of sight, he darts across the hall and unlocks the door she just bolted. He quickly slips inside, Almondine following silently.

The short hallway leads to another door. Edgar walks toward it.

While tearing up the blanket makes him feel marginally better when he gets a good ripping sound out of it, it's almost frustrating Yuri more due to his inability to get really good grip on it with his paws. He growls at it, standing on the cloth so he can grab it in his jaws and pull. He's too absorbed in the task to notice that Daine's mood has shifted, and he doesn't yet hear or smell any sign of the new arrivals. You don't -- understand! he tells her, giving it a particularly good rip.

Daine's about to ask him to explain it to her, then, when she feels a familiar brush of wild magic against her mind. She sits up sharply, brow furrowing. What in Mithros's name is Almondine doing outside? It doesn't matter - what matters is that she leaves before Yuri scents or hears her.

Almondine, no, Daine silently calls to the dog. You shouldn't be here. And if Almondine's here... Daine's heart sinks. Is Edgar with you?

Edited 2013-04-10 02:32 (UTC)

Almondine, hearing Daine, hesitates, but Edgar is already opening the second door.

Yes, she answers Daine. Then she whines, once, and noses Edgar's leg.

Edgar spares her a glance, and she recognizes the stubbornness in his eyes.

I'm sorry, she tells Daine, and follows Edgar through the second door.

If Daine asked him now, Yuri might actually tell her. Perhaps he can add the fact that he's more open to revealing things he otherwise wouldn't when he's a bear to the reasons why she shouldn't sit up with him. Or not, since she doesn't actually get to it.

He pauses, ears lifting, and sniffs the air. No smell yet, but he's sure there was a sound a moment ago -- an animal sound, even. Did you hear that? he asks Daine.

Daine rises to her feet, frowning. She might try to order Almondine out, but that wouldn't stop Edgar - and if Edgar's coming in, she'll need to keep her energy reserved for Yuri. "It's Edgar and Almondine," she explains, hoping that he'll stay calmer if he isn't surprised. "I don't know what they're doing here," she adds. She certainly hadn't invited them, and she wonders if they followed her, or if Edgar just asked Almondine to seek her out. The latter is certainly a possibility; it wouldn't have occurred to Daine to hide herself from any of the People in the base since they all avoid this corridor instinctively.

Don't come in, she advises Almondine. Maybe if Yuri doesn't actually see her, the bear part of him will be less likely to think he's being delivered a snack.

Another door, but this time Edgar thinks he can hear something beyond it. More eagerly now, he fumbles with the lock.

Almondine is hanging back, but he barely notices. The lock clunks open and Edgar opens the door.

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