Seth (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
powerdealer) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
bigapplesauce2014-11-19 02:08 am
powerdealer) wrote in bigapplesauce2014-11-19 02:08 am
[closed] I guess I just brushed through your mind more gently than I intended to
Seth has had a pretty uneventful few days since he last spoke to Daniel, if you don't count getting pretty intensely rained on yesterday (which had sucked, but at least the city isn't exactly cold these days), and thinking for a moment he'd met someone from his home universe before that. That had admittedly been pretty weird, even if it had become evident more or less immediately that Eliot was not Curtis. Still, minor occurrences in pretty slow days, really. Days which have largely been spent mulling about his life.
Meeting not-Curtis had been a rather painful reminder of his home universe, and of London. He doesn't think much about it these days, so when it crosses his mind, he's always surprised by how much he misses it. He misses Manchester too, but at least he'd left that voluntarily, moving towards something rather than just being ripped away, and he'd always had the opportunity to go back there if he wanted. Sure, he'd been ready to leave London behind too, but it was for something, going to stay with Kelly, and then he'd been unceremoniously dumped in Manhattan - not just on the other side of the world, but in a completely different universe with no way back. Ripped away from the person he cared about, just like Shannon had been unfairly ripped away from him before that.
But even so, he's been trying instead to focus on building something worth missing here - although he's not particularly good at that, keeping most people at arm's length, and doing a damn good job at sabotaging himself. He hasn't done what Johnny suggested, and actually talked to Gabe about help with his drug problem, and he doesn't intend to. It's just that a lot of the time there doesn't seem to be much point building something. He had tried to do that when he first arrived too, once he got over the whole 'what the actual fuck' of the situation. He'd made friends. Forged some alliances. And then that had been ripped away from him too, and he had spent the next almost four months locked in a cell with various degrees of abuse done to him. A hundred and sixteen days. It's been several weeks now since the point where he'd been free for a longer time than he spent locked up, so you would think maybe the nightmares would stop and he could start to get over it, instead of feeling like complete shit every time it's brought up, particularly when he's sober. No wonder he's hesitant to open himself up. And perhaps part of it is just that he considers himself so much of a mess these days that he wouldn't wish himself on most people, and those he would are generally not people he likes to be around. So in the months that have passed, you could easily count the number of friends he's made on one hand. Pathetic, really.
Still. He's trying. He has been working on building up the courage to take Johnny's other advice, and actually talk to Daniel about how he feels about guys and dating and all of that. Now that Seth has finally started admitting to himself that he's actually attracted to him (not to mention that he sometimes likes guys in general), he's trying to figure out what to do about it, and how to find out if Daniel would be even remotely interested in that sort of thing. You know, actually try to build something. Despite the fact that neither of his two significant romantic relationships so far had actually been initiated by him, and that he actually resisted them for a while, out of a desire to protect himself from getting hurt. So this is... different. He's slowly working towards actually putting himself out there, actually showing his interest. The dream he had yesterday had kind of helped give him a nudge too, and it had been a remarkably vivid dream for just a regular non-shared one. He'd been disappointed when it ended, and it had brought into almost painful clarity what it is he wants. He's been unable to really put it out of his mind, so he finally figured he actually has to do something about the whole situation.
To that end, he's arranged to meet up with Daniel near the park to hang out. Daniel seems to love seeing new parts of the city, so Seth wants to show him the lovely Conservatory gardens, and have a bit of a picnic. Well, sort of. There's no picnic basket or checkered blanket or anything, but he did bring some sandwiches (bought, not homemade - he wants to make sure they're actually good), and also stopped by a coffee shop. Nice and pleasant setting, even kind of romantic (though he tries not to think too hard about that), perfect for just a relaxed conversation. He's only hoping the weather holds up.
Right now he's heading towards the rather plain corner of 5th avenue and 106th street, which is where he asked Daniel to meet up. He's not even noticing how people's eyes seem to slip right over him, considering that's usually his actual goal, trying to be as unassuming and unnoticable as possible. Comes from quite a few years of dealing drugs, and then spending months being on the run from secret (literally) underground organisations out to get him - you don't really want to draw attention.
Meeting not-Curtis had been a rather painful reminder of his home universe, and of London. He doesn't think much about it these days, so when it crosses his mind, he's always surprised by how much he misses it. He misses Manchester too, but at least he'd left that voluntarily, moving towards something rather than just being ripped away, and he'd always had the opportunity to go back there if he wanted. Sure, he'd been ready to leave London behind too, but it was for something, going to stay with Kelly, and then he'd been unceremoniously dumped in Manhattan - not just on the other side of the world, but in a completely different universe with no way back. Ripped away from the person he cared about, just like Shannon had been unfairly ripped away from him before that.
But even so, he's been trying instead to focus on building something worth missing here - although he's not particularly good at that, keeping most people at arm's length, and doing a damn good job at sabotaging himself. He hasn't done what Johnny suggested, and actually talked to Gabe about help with his drug problem, and he doesn't intend to. It's just that a lot of the time there doesn't seem to be much point building something. He had tried to do that when he first arrived too, once he got over the whole 'what the actual fuck' of the situation. He'd made friends. Forged some alliances. And then that had been ripped away from him too, and he had spent the next almost four months locked in a cell with various degrees of abuse done to him. A hundred and sixteen days. It's been several weeks now since the point where he'd been free for a longer time than he spent locked up, so you would think maybe the nightmares would stop and he could start to get over it, instead of feeling like complete shit every time it's brought up, particularly when he's sober. No wonder he's hesitant to open himself up. And perhaps part of it is just that he considers himself so much of a mess these days that he wouldn't wish himself on most people, and those he would are generally not people he likes to be around. So in the months that have passed, you could easily count the number of friends he's made on one hand. Pathetic, really.
Still. He's trying. He has been working on building up the courage to take Johnny's other advice, and actually talk to Daniel about how he feels about guys and dating and all of that. Now that Seth has finally started admitting to himself that he's actually attracted to him (not to mention that he sometimes likes guys in general), he's trying to figure out what to do about it, and how to find out if Daniel would be even remotely interested in that sort of thing. You know, actually try to build something. Despite the fact that neither of his two significant romantic relationships so far had actually been initiated by him, and that he actually resisted them for a while, out of a desire to protect himself from getting hurt. So this is... different. He's slowly working towards actually putting himself out there, actually showing his interest. The dream he had yesterday had kind of helped give him a nudge too, and it had been a remarkably vivid dream for just a regular non-shared one. He'd been disappointed when it ended, and it had brought into almost painful clarity what it is he wants. He's been unable to really put it out of his mind, so he finally figured he actually has to do something about the whole situation.
To that end, he's arranged to meet up with Daniel near the park to hang out. Daniel seems to love seeing new parts of the city, so Seth wants to show him the lovely Conservatory gardens, and have a bit of a picnic. Well, sort of. There's no picnic basket or checkered blanket or anything, but he did bring some sandwiches (bought, not homemade - he wants to make sure they're actually good), and also stopped by a coffee shop. Nice and pleasant setting, even kind of romantic (though he tries not to think too hard about that), perfect for just a relaxed conversation. He's only hoping the weather holds up.
Right now he's heading towards the rather plain corner of 5th avenue and 106th street, which is where he asked Daniel to meet up. He's not even noticing how people's eyes seem to slip right over him, considering that's usually his actual goal, trying to be as unassuming and unnoticable as possible. Comes from quite a few years of dealing drugs, and then spending months being on the run from secret (literally) underground organisations out to get him - you don't really want to draw attention.
Aww it's okay! No worries :)
Outside, she frowns as she watches various pedestrians ignore Seth in increasingly improbable ways. She even sticks out her foot to trip a woman, who stops just in time, looks around with a confused expression, and steps aside.
"Okay so, it's affecting both of us," Dana concludes, not entirely happy about having this confirmed, but at least she's not alone in whatever this problem is. She notices that Seth's shoulders relax just a little, but makes no comment. "I guess this would make it harder to get coffee, though." She offers a sheepish grin. "If you still wanted to?"
She'd like to get to know him a little better, since he seems nice. Back home this sort of randomly-occurring misfortune would probably be reversed in a couple of hours, but if these corporeal difficulties are anything like permanent, Dana wants to have at least one friend who knows what she's going through.
no subject
"I mean... since it's both of us, chances are it's a Rift thing, affecting more people," he theorises out loud, as he pokes a random passerby in the shoulder. The man brushes off his shoulder with a frown but doesn't seem to notice Seth is even there.
"Which probably means people are working on it," he adds, turning back to Dana. "So, merely waiting isn't actually the worst idea." Waiting and also checking the network. He just doesn't particularly want to wait alone, and he suspects Dana doesn't either. And she seems sweet. Cute too, though considering Daniel is taking up most of his mind in that department, that's less important.