let's play a game where we don't touch the angel [open to multiple]

[bibliophale]

[Aziraphale, Book!Melanie, and Poetry!Spike are gonna be hanging out in his bookshop all day, so feel free to pop by! Melanie can see and hear you, and will communicate with you if you look at her pages. Spike is only able to speak in verse. And if you touch Aziraphale, you will be turned into a book. The choice is yours.]

Aziraphale sets Melanie down gingerly on the front counter, keeping her close. He looks around nervously. He can't touch anything. Can't have tea, can't have any of Sunshine's wonderful baked goods, can't read books. He's going to have to just stand here stoic and keep watch over his book girl.

He picks her up again and holds her around. "Here we are," he says, feeling rather foolish. Spike is due in at any moment, he hopes the vampire doesn't walk in now, as he's showing a book the bookstore. That would look very silly. He sets her back down and opens her up to a blank page. "I'll make sure no one tries to buy you. I'm very good at that. Don't worry."

This is going to be a long day.


[Reply to the post to interact with Aziraphale and/or Melanie, and to Spike's top level to interact with Spike. Time is complicated but it's gonna be okay we'll get through this.]

Comments

[omnomnom_feels]

"Because it is dangerous," repeats Rashad. "When I was last unable to fulfill my ordinary functions the results were...undesirable. You will help me. If you are unable to do so now you will assist me in divining a method."

[bibliophale]

"Do not presume to command me," says Aziraphale haughtily. "I will do no such thing. You, rather, will leave my shop before I lose my patience." He gestures sharply toward the door.

[omnomnom_feels]

"I will not leave your shop," Rashad informs him firmly, stepping forward and reaching out a wrist to tap against Aziraphale's arm, knowing it will affix him to the angel as firmly as the doorknob and phone are affixed to his hands. "I will not leave you until you assist me --"

And then he's falling, utterly disoriented as a rain of miscellaneous small books clatters to the floor around him. Rashad lays on the floor and stares at the ceiling, stunned and confused about the sudden change in position and the loss of sensation from all the things that were stuck to him a moment ago. Did Aziraphale solve the problem? Rashad tries to lift a hand to look at it and see if it is empty, but nothing happens.

Why can I not move? asks the unseen front page of a closed book on the floor of Aziraphale's shop. Across its cover in block letters, the title reads NHODD.

[bibliophale]

"Wait-!" Aziraphale cries just an instant too late, trying to duck back but not able to keep the eloim from making contact. Well, down he goes, showered by other little books - apparently the transitive property applies here. Fantastic.

Aziraphale sighs and picks his way out from behind the counter, looking down at the book.

"Nhodd," he reads softly, only a little surprised, and only for a moment. "So that's your name."

He crouches down and flips open the cover.

"You've been turned into a book," he answers. "Just as anything you've touched today adheres to you, anything I touch becomes a book. Terribly sorry." He's not, at least not so terribly.

He reaches out to pick Rashad up, but finds he can't. He tries again, putting a greater amount of strength into it. Irritably, he tries to miracle the book onto the counter.

"It seems I wouldn't have been able to help you even if you had persuaded me," he says dryly. "You seem to be stuck."

[omnomnom_feels]

It has been some time since he heard the sound of his real name. It has been less time since he last made a mistake of this magnitude, and he bears Aziraphale's pulling with all the patience an emotionless, inanimate object can bring to bear while rethinking his life choices.

It is strange how he is not experiencing any of the sensations he would expect from being turned into a book, but on further reflection he decides that he does not know what sensations he would expect under these circumstances. This is not acceptable, he informs Aziraphale should the angel bother to read it. I am even less able to function in this format.

[bibliophale]

"Well," sighs Aziraphale. "I don't know what you want me to do. This is not something I'd have chosen, believe you me. It is likely some sort of... Rift trickery."

He straightens up. "Until someone works out a way to reverse the process I believe you are consigned to remain where you are, as you are. Unfortunately for both of us."

[omnomnom_feels]

Perhaps you should have told me sooner that I would be transformed into a book, the book points out. It will be troublesome if I become hungry in this form. I attempted to warn you.

[bibliophale]

"I attempted to warn you," says Aziraphale irritably. "I didn't think you would be so unreasonable as to just reach out and accost me." He frowns down at the inconvenient book. "If you get hungry I suppose you'll just have to be hungry."

[omnomnom_feels]

Rashad's page is blank for a moment. He is reluctant to clarify his reason for seeking help to return to normal rather than waiting it out attached to his door, but he finally displays a single word.

Dangerous.

Then, as an afterthought, he adds an equally pressing complaint:

Inconvenient.

[bibliophale]

"Yes, well." Aziraphale sighs and bends down to tip the cover shut. "I'm afraid we shall both have to forbear. I must shut you up now, lest some trip over you and tear your pages out. I shall check on you periodically."

Rather darkly satisfied by this turn of events, he returns to his desk.